New website

[mamagotcha]

So some of you know I have done some work with perinatal hospice, as well as one-on-one doula support for families facing miscarriage or the loss of a child.

I've been toying with the idea of trying to get something started while I'm here in Chicago, and this website is what I've come up with.

If you have the time or inclination to do so, would you take a look at it and let me know what you think?

(If I could, I would add another page full of pregnancy loss-related websites and books, but I've already used up all the pages I've been allotted. I still might try to shoehorn those in... maybe consolidate two of the other pages?)

I am also willing to accompany and support women through abortions, although that's not what I want the site to be about. Do you think I should include that specifically on this site, or would it alienate other potential clients?

Thank you!

ETA: I've incorporated most of what M and J suggested below, but I'd still love more feedback if anyone wants to throw it my way!

I know the text on the "Contact Me" window is smaller than the text on the other windows, but I can't figure out (yet) how to change it... and I'm a bit mystified that it's different from the other pages. Anyway, I've noticed it and I'm working on it.

Comments

[mh75.livejournal.com]

1. There are a limited number of pages you are allowed to have?
weird.
2. If you want to be available for abortions, i think you need to mention it on your website. I think there is a natural place for it - you mention d&c there.
3. It is a visually beautiful website!
4. What i do: I feel like this section has some weird qualifiers in it, and could be edited a bit. It would stand on its own, as is, but i believe you can tighten it up with another pass.
I prefer 'I can attend', to 'I am willing to attend' - it just sounds more positive to me. Also, 'I have experience' to 'I have some experience'.
any means that is most convenient for both of us. ... 'or by means comfortable for the family'
I don't think you need the note about only being available if you can find your own child care - it is something that will come up, of course, but the website generally does not go into specifics of how the arrangement will work, and any provider has the right to say 'i can't accept a client at this time', or to discuss that detail when it becomes necessary. It is also alluded to in the payment discussion.
5. About me: While I still feel so blessed and honored to be invited to witness any birth, I feel I have been gifted with knowledge and experience from those precious babies who had to leave us too soon. I'd remove the word 'while' there, and perhaps the word 'still', too. (I feel blessed and honored..., AND I feel I have been...)

Good luck!

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

Thanks, M! After working on something like this for a while, it all starts to blur, and having some fresh eyes go over it is SUCH a help. Great comments, thank you so much for taking the time to look it over! xoxo

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

OK, I've worked on it some more (adding both your and Julia's improvements), if you want to look at it again. Thanks a million!

[jedusor.livejournal.com]

Looks good! A couple errors:

"I can help parents tap into our inner wisdom" looks like it should be "their inner wisdom".

"explore ways to find new pathways to through fear or grief"--there's an extra "to" that shouldn't be there.

And some style/flow suggestions you can take or leave as you see fit:

Just from an aesthetic viewpoint, I'd prefer a little more white space under the main title. Maybe just a line break above the body text.

The second sentence of the first bullet point under "What I do" (the one starting "Support is...") is a bit run-on and required two readings for me to parse it correctly.

"Your baby is so important to you"--I'd remove "so," or change it to a different intensifier. A "so" leads me to expect a "that".

"I can attend to her and her family if she desires that type of support"--there's already an "if" earlier in this sentence; I think the bit after the word "family" is implied and can be omitted.

"through fear or grief towards healing and peace"--I know "towards" rather than "toward" is considered acceptable by some people, but it's still jarring to me to see it in writing.

"help you get what you need to care for, birth and celebrate your child"--I'd prefer an Oxford comma here.

"I also was privileged to serve several families"--I'd leave out "also," but if it needs to be there, I'd phrase it "I was also".

"every one of those special babies touched their families, and me, so deeply"--again, "so" leads me to expect "that".

"I've been continuing to educate myself"--maybe "I've continued to educate myself" instead?

"I feel so blessed and honored"--again, the "so" (here I think it can be left out, as M suggested).

I think the last paragraph of the "About me" section should be moved to the beginning.

If you're looking to add a page of links and recommendations, perhaps you could move the information about cost to either the intro section or the "What I do" section.

If your goal is to get a support network going in your area, maybe it would be a good idea to change the "Looking for support?" section title to something more along the lines of "Contact me" and include an invitation for other support providers to contact you as well as people seeking support.

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Mishie! <3 <3 <3

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

OK, updated everything. Can you look again? Thanks! xoxo

[paulaandandrew.livejournal.com]

Very nice!

A few things; I found this cumbersome: Providing support is NOT me telling you what to do.

I suggest putting your name on the home page, maybe at the beginning of the second paragraph.

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I was wondering how to say that, and finally I just yanked it out.

I wasn't positive about putting my name on the first page, thinking that perhaps I would have a few other doulas working with me down the road. But that's easily changed; it's on there for now.

I appreciate you taking the time to check it out! xoxo

[cheesepuppet.livejournal.com]

This is random, but then it's late and I'm in need of sleep; the title font bothered me. It felt like something you'd see on a Beach Boys album. By which I mean, it felt too casual and slick for something that's much more thoughtful and somber and serene.

Otherwise I think it's a great idea, and I bet you will help a lot of women. *hugs*

[tara-doula.livejournal.com]

I think it is very serene and comforting. Any family would be blessed to have you by their side.