bittersweet

[mamagotcha]

there is a pile of boys playing mario supersmash in the living room. they are hollering and laughing, fortified by costco pizza and soda, chips and salsa. linc is happily messing up their magic and pirate games, and bill is kibutzing. clay and cord are having five friends spend the night as a goodbye party. and it's probable that cordell will, after traveling out west on our road trip, stay in davis and not return to kansas city.

i can't blame him for one second, but it's going to be hard here without him. he really is so helpful with things like the lawn and garbage, playing with the baby, doing the dishes... and we'll lose the child support for him half a year early. wiley and cil will miss him badly.

but nothing like i will.

still... his dad moved out of his family home when he was seventeen, and i think his father did too. i'm very proud to think that he's confident enough to feel he can get a job and a place to live on his own (jeff is planning to move to san ramon after remarrying in july, so he won't be there to help). i know he's been the most homesick of all of us.

i'm so glad he's coming on this road trip; it will be a good chance to really connect before he leaves. but it's so strange to look around and think that i'll be shipping his stuff out back out there... clay will have his own room (we'll keep cord's bed for visits, though).

it's hard. i wasn't expecting this, except... i was.

julia is stressing on her biology exam tomorrow; i'm stressing on IJA workshops and getting ready for the trip. the van came through with flying colors. everyone is better after their stomach flu adventure. we hired someone to walk the dog each day.

and i've got a pile of boys that are ready for their root-beer floats.

Comments

[vito-excalibur.livejournal.com]

{hug}

That must be tough.

I'm glad y'all are feeling better.

[lunacow]

I'm getting a bit teary for you. Damn, that must suck. (Yeah, I'm really helping, huh?)

I'm thinking about how eye-rolly I got whenever my parents made a fuss about me leaving home. I didn't see it from their side at all. That didn't mean I didn't love them. Keep that in mind when Cord says "aw, Mom, stop it" when the time comes. He'll get it someday.

[mamagotcha.livejournal.com]

they watched PotC at 2 a.m., and were still laughing and gabbing at 4:40 a.m. (when i came out and told 'em to keep it down). i came down at 8 a.m. and they were all up and at it again, this time with a knee-high pile of pillows and sleeping bags, and bowls of cereal and bagels.

cord and bill are still sleeping; julia joined in the party when jack sparrow did, and she's still going. i asked about her bio final, and she said i could bug her when she got a bad grade.

it's gonna be a looooong day.

thanks for the sympathy, gang. i sure 'preciate the virtual shoulder!

[jedusor.livejournal.com]

*grins* Did I get a bad grade? Hmm?